INTO THE WOODS NEAR THE RAINBOW BRIDGE

"Ms. Macy, when you are ready, you can pick up the final remains, you poor dear, but be thankful that the children and you are unharmed." I wore black, tried to keep up a Christmas spirit, attempting to sing along with carols blasting a rental car's radio. I was too nervous, numb to drive. An old faithful friend drove me to Rutherford's Auto Body Shop in Pickerington, Ohio. That was where I would say farewell to a reliable, faithful friend...my car. Upon our arrival, I was handed a bag in which I could finish clearing what I had left before the tow truck came to the Zanesville driveway. Garage door opener and ice scraper (like I had a car, never mind a windshield at this point). I sat in the car to remove a small broom riding witch from the rear view mirror. As I clung to her, I began to apologize to her, to the car, to the deer. My friend, most likely with a crowbar, eased me out of the corpse, mostly carrying me back to the shop's office. I was handed a box of tissues by the kind receptionist as a technician handed me my license plates! I was then inconsolable. Let me explain: At about 6 P.M. on December 3, my grandchildren Tess (10, Tanner (7) and I set out to go to gymnastics. Todd, their brother, eleven years old, chose to remain at home with his Mom, my daughter. So, singing Christmas carols, we drove my 2012 Mazda 3 along South River Road in Zanesville, Ohio. The four lane road parallels a river. We were on the far side, fourth lane from the river. Suddenly, "on the fourth day of Christmas" there was a thud, a severe push to the side of the road, glass, airbags commandeered the car! Tanner, riding behind me, began screaming and crying...his airbag began pushing him to the other side of the car. "Tanner, try to undo the seat belt and scoot behind Tess (riding next to me - "shot gun") Hurry, something is wrong!" Tess, the swiftest of us: "Meme! (may-may) are you okay? Call 9-1-1!" I hadn't a clue what had happened. My driver's side air bag deployed, glass was everywhere from the driver's side windows! As I turned off the engine, at the side of the road, I looked out of my windshield to see a white mist, a white fog in the loose shape of a deer! The spirit arched over my hood and dissolved! There was nothing. "Tess! Did you see that?" Crying, both children responded that the ghost of a deer was there and gone! A State Trooper recommended that I pull my car into a nearby side street. The driver's side of the car was terribly damaged. My door couldn't open, so I crawled across the car to exit. We were all unharmed. I was not scratched, cut, however, my seat was loaded with glass! The entire side no longer existed, really and there was not much left of the driver's front fender, headlight, part of the hood either. There was some fur wedged into a crevice though. A sweet woman walked over to me with a big black "thing" slung over her shoulder. "Hey M'am, where do you want your wheel well cover?" Dazed, I responded, "How about the trunk?" My son-in-law arrived with my daughter. He,trying to be helpful said: "Laura, you just can't see deer at night, you know. Hunting season has just begun and deer are running will-nilly." Gee, that made me feel better...NOT! I began to complain to the Trooper that since the deer didn't have insurance and since that poor creature was running from the river for his life, hunters should learn to go food shopping in stores and leave the deer alone! This is 2014, not pioneer days! My son-in-law assured me that he has had two deer crashes himself! Swell. My daughter, not so understanding. She began berating me for not being alert to have seen it coming, she didn't want the car returned to her driveway, that since I was a ninny, to just go home! Double swell. Tess spoke up and told her: "IT WAS AN ACCIDENT! MEME DIDN'T AIM FOR A DEER! SHE USED TO WORK AT THE ZOO AND LOVES ANIMALS! TWO DEER LIVE IN HER YARD!" Tanner, still sobbing, told her: "Hey Mom! I was looking out of my window to try to see the river and I didn't see the deer! He hit my side of the car and I didn't see him!" The Trooper looked at this collection of crazies and was extremely sorry that he didn't call in sick that evening. MY son-in-law insisted that my daughter be quiet, that we bring the car back to the house. I asked the Trooper if I could drive it 132 miles back to Kettering. He guaranteed me that: 1. it wouldn't make it - it barely turned the corner to park out of traffic; 2. illegal to drive without two headlights; 3. no visibility with airbags inflated; 4. I would freeze without windows. The scenario sounded rather bleak! Since we were only 1/4 mile from the house, my son-in-law said that he would drive the car back and I could drive his. Knowing that I would never drive again if I didn't put on my big girl panties and get behind the ailing car's wheel, I insisted that I take it back. As Mazda and I limped along, I stopped! My son-in-law, got out of his car, behind me, and approached: "Why are you stopping, here in the middle of the road?" As if he landed from Mars, I responded: "Look! All across the road, there is such a mess...the deer must be splattered all over!" He stood there, shook his head and said: "There is nothing! Drive on, or let me get in front of you and you take my car with the children." Hmmmm....strange. The Mazda and I continued. My daughter's nasty was still raging. I ignored her. Todd ran to me: "Meme! Are you okay?" I assured him that I was "righter than rain". He then replied: "Oh boy! I miss all the good stuff! I shoulda gone to watch those two flip out and around! I could have seen it all and not gone to gymnastics after all!" Ah, to be eleven! We are aware of "The Rainbow Bridge" where our pets wait to play with us again. After watching the spirit of the deer rise, I know that those poor beautiful creatures who meet accidental, untimely ends, through no fault of their own, play, forage, wait for their families if you go INTO THE WOODS NEAR THE RAINBOW BRIDGE.