I have been investigating "work at home" claims, websites and the like. The snake oil salesmen attempt to be slick, so sincere and so eager to share their secrets and want to see you succeed! No risk involved and blah, blah, blah. I love the "absolutely free" claims with the catch at the end of a video presentation of an absolutely new and free (honestly, ask my neighbors) program, for a mere one time only fee of $99, $299, $1099 (unless you sign up five seconds ago, then, there is a 75% discount because we want you to succeed!) SERIOUSLY? Let's look at this massive mess of deceit logically.
First of all, if Slick Sammy the Salesman was making mad money, hand over fist with a gimmick to allow him to swim in money, exactly WHY would ne be sharing with any assorted bored, broke, sluggish Internet surfing underachievers in their tidy-whities? Honestly, if you could make a bazillion dollars, would you share with a bazillion strangers? Maybe friends, family, but STRANGERS? Ah-ha...just as I thought!
"Ladies and gentlemen, step right up, move in a little closer, all you need is a computer, Internet connection, will and desire! We'll train you. Follow our step by step, proven methods!" If all of these claimants had megaphones, instead of snappy "volume controls", you'd think that you were walking the Net Midway through an alley of Barkers! What a carnival of garbage!
The scariest and yet most ridiculous scam out there on the "Work at Home" bandwagon is one where by, you have a "Mentor". Patty will phone and after a pep talk about how she is doing soooooo well working at home, directs you to write down your three goals, and on and on, moves in for the kill asking for $299 to begin making a Six Figure Income (would that be $000000?) immediately. After Patty is told that $299 isn't possible for a week or two, she then proposes, "Oh, I get it. It's tough. You'll be so glad that you are on track to do this though. So, I'll tell you what I'm going to do" (Original? Not hardly). "For $9.99, enthuses Patty, "I'll send you twelve bottles of the healthiest product ever formulated so that you learn to love it! We don't do sales, you will only manage your own site, your own business, but if you love the product, you will have an incentive to join the program! You can even put some in a cooler, when you visit friends or family and nonchalantly pull one out, start drinking and they'll want to know where you got it and how to buy some!" Whoa, wait a minute Patty! This was to make money from web pages...no sales, no inventory; no deliveries, etc. Where did cooler hawking come from? Now, can you picture stopping to visit a friend, having lunch, coffee, or tea with your daughter, Mom, sister and whipping out a cooler and think they will clamor for "hat?" Ah-ha...go to Northern Jersey or NYC with a cooler and have my Italian family even let me in the door as a peddler? My friends have breeding and money. "Here, Gail, when you are finished jetting between cruises, your houses, Ireland and while shopping at Bergdorf's, get jealous over this bug juice!" Or, "Hey Suzanne! Forget the Grey Goose and Dom's bubbly, have a zap of stupidity!" Or even better, at the next SAG-AFTRA mixer, meet and greet, I slam my cooler on the table and offer A and B Listers a swig of health! SERIOUSLY? I know, I know, at the next Hog Roast, with the Country music playing, the barn cleared for dancing, the steer out in the Adkins field; as cases of beer are iced, "Thanks for including this City Slicker again this year, Rick! I love this ho-down...how about tossing back some pure glutton free, low-cal, watery health?" SERIOUSLY? Patty and the cooler goo even outdid Lisa who swoops down on a poor soul's carcass after all else fails and sends: "Sorry you're having trouble. Click this link for an absolutely free opportunity." Adrian, in a video sales letter pushes his "social commission" scam then for a mere, $19.99 (instead of $99) AND after passing that screen, how about $99 (discounted from $399) for "set up" to this totally free, HOAX!
I am not a "lifestyle snob", really, but if a person is out of options and out of money, these predators should be jailed and banned from the Internet. I am a writer ,so really, the above are not too relevant...HOWEVER, this brings me to "Hired Board", Beyond.com" Elance, "My Writing Jobs", "Real Writing Jobs", "Hub Pages," and a slew of bogus insults. Forget them all, go back to school, get a job doing ANYTHING!
First of all, poor writer, bring money and lots of it. There are fees, commissions to pay to the sites should you get n assignment (not likely). Moe cash has to be invested totally disrespecting any talent that the writer may have. Money a must; talent unnecessary, no experience needed. Second of all, don't think that the assignments are valid...they don't exist. Third, for whichever "job" you bid, thinking there is a job, you won't get it because someone from India, Pakistan, Bangladesh will write a 750 word piece for $.25! That's not a typo, I meant TWENTY-FIVE CENTS FOR THE ENTIRE 750 WORDS ALTOGETHER. (NOT PER)
If these were legitimate jobs, I understand paying a commission to the company , in order to obtain them...AFTER the job is completed, paid from you to the Company. BUT...paying to "join" to troll for assorted flim-flam "opportunities" is sad and desperate. If an individual had the funds to "join" these "exclusive" and "wealth building" enterprises, he/she wouldn't NEED them!
So, THINK, THINK, THINK and be warned! Or, lose your shirt (pant, hat and coat as well!)
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