Monday, April 27, 2015

THEY'VE MOVED PARADISE AND PUT IN ZANESVILLE ( I KNOW I'M YOUR FAVORITE )

One day, as I was contemplating curly or straight hair after a shower, my phone rang.  Well, it didn't actually ring.  My ring tone sounds like Tinkerbell entering the movie set of Peter Pan.  It twinkles.  Anyway, the Trio (Grandchildren - Todd, 11; Tess, 10; Tanner 7) on speaker, with their Mom (my daughter, aka, The Princess of Zanesville) singing backup:  "Meme! (may-may)  Guess what?  You are going to come over and play, take care of us for a whole week!  We're going to dancing lessons, gymnastics, Oriental Buffet, Bob Evans, Roosters- we can get balloon animals there, Picnic Pizza!  We need to go to the Mall!  Make sure you bring Taylor Ham and Italian Bread!  Did you find the book about Andre the Giant for me (Todd)?  Did you finish shortening my First Communion Pants? (Tanner)  Can you come to a special recycle party at school with me and stay for lunch (Tanner again)  We're going to have so much fun!"  Apparently the Princess needed a vacation and the Trio was planning an itinerary to be the busiest and eventually the poorest grandmother in Ohio.  That being said...

We managed to get to school on time on Monday.  I happened to wake up, flip on the news and realize that I'd better get busy.  Attending Mass with Tanner was pleasant enough and we managed to get to our lessons without incident.  Well, mysteriously, Tess could find only one of her ballet shoes!  Hmmm...for two feet.  "But, Meme!  At Whitney's (dance instructor/studio owner) store next door (enterprising Ballet Teacher, yes?), there are the new ballet shoes that I've been begging Mommy for!  They have a split sole..."  Ah-ha!  Convenient loss, n'est-pas?  The Oriental Buffet, that evening dished out "Italian Meatballs" skewered, three on a stick.  Chock full of rice!  REALLY?  Ah, the company was key, not so much the fare.

Thinking that I was a cool, techno-grandparent, I set the alarm on my phone to wake us up on Tuesday morning.  Did you know that Zanesville is not in the same time zone as Guatemala?  How my phone hitched into Guatemala time is beyond me.  We just barely made it in time to Todd and Tess' Middle School, only because the teacher at the door was distracted by my horn and loud music enough to stand, look around, take it all in and not close the door until it was five minutes later!  YES!  When I signed Tanner into his school late, the secretary said:  "Well, that's some story!  If it were anyone else, I wouldn't believe a word, but from you, Mrs. Macy, Guatemala figures!"   Should I be offended?  Before dinner at Bob Evans where on Tuesdays Children Eat Free (except on my $45.00 check, it seems), I bought an alarm clock and four extra batteries.

On Wednesday morning, I couldn't turn off the alarm clock.  Tess said: "Meme!  Look for the switch to turn it off!"  Todd struggled to open two eyes, turned it off  with the switch, looked at me and said:"Duh?"  Tanner, whose hair looked as if he did it with a lightning bolt, said: "Meme!  You've just been 'duhhed'!"  Yes, I managed to get to Todd and Tess' Mass and to the "Recycle" party.  Yes, I zipped to a "Subway" for Tanner's lunch.  The balloon animals just "made" dinner at Rooster's!

Thursday, according to the news, was:  "Bring Your Daughter/Child To Work Day".  Nice.  The children began watching the morning news, as I do, getting ready for school during the week.  As I was putting breakfast on the table, I heard giggling as they tumbled down the stairs, in their jammies!  "What are you doing?  Why don't you have on your uniforms?  We're going to be late!  Mom will be furious if you are late twice in the week Tanner!  Todd, Tess, we aren't going to be lucky another day to escape late slips!  Let's move it!"  "Meme!  We saw on the news, you know, you tell us to watch the news!  We saw that it's take your kids to work day!  So, we figured we didn't have to get dressed...we'll stay with you at your work!  Or, well, what is it that you DO do anyway?"  The Mall and Picnic Pizza pushed me right into poverty level, but it was so worth it!  Vinnie, the owner of Picnic Pizza, I understand is originally from Sicily, through Queens and fell off of a covered wagon in Zanesville!

What I have not mentioned...the restaurants were fine, except for the rice in meatballs.  The week was fun.  The Mall, pricey...Todd's LeBron Nikes, Tess' pink, lacy glittery Nikes, Tanner's really cute shoes from Children's Place, Justice outfits, accessories for Tess, X-Box Live connection for Tanner, Tsum-Tsums for Tess (18 of them), Wrestling belts for Todd.  Snuggling at night, whispers, secrets, stories about my Nana.

Tanner:  "You'll bring me to the Church early to meet my class on Communion Day? The others can meet us in time for the Mass.  Shhhh....don't tell the big kids.  I know I'm your favorite."

Tess:  "Meme, I always love the way you smell (Thanks Organza).  You'll be my maid of honor when I get married, right?  Don't tell the boys, but I know that I'm your favorite."

Todd:  "Hey Meme!  When the kids go to sleep, I'll teach you how to do X-Box Smack Down and Chairs and Ladders.  You can be Kane or The Rock!  We can talk and play like grownups without the kids!  I know, Meme, I'm your favorite and always will be!"



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